Fearful and Inhibited

i survived this day with a blast of adrenaline rush and inhibitons. i did an echocardiography of patient x of 73F complaining of chest pain, cough and occasional dyspnea and ortopnea. she was referred by an adult IM-Pulmonologist. she has good windows it's just that i was not good enough in doing an echo. haisst. it's so frustrating.i have lots of things to do and i must keep my mind in focus so i could have a good coordination. my hands, my eyes, my brain they should all function well plus the normal values, i got to remember all of it while doing an echo.

it was so difficult. people may see it as simply putting a transducer on the patients chest but it's not easy as it may seem. you must have a lot of patience and presence of mind when you do it. unfortunately, in my case i don't think i'm competent and efficient enough. i admit it with all honesty and as early as now i could already imagine the reaction of the doctor when he read the echo. maybe i'd just say "oh ground please swallow me".

hope he won't belittleand redicule me that much. i know he's a good person but i never seen him angry and that's why i'm so afraid. nevertheless, i'll just pray for it. sooner or later i'll be doing it on my own so it's better that i do it while my co-worker is still here to help me.

i just hope i could do something to have some recording of the measurements i've forgotten.


those who knew something about 2D echo please give me some tips for me to improve my skills in handling the transducer :)thank you :)

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i miss advertisements like this. the girl reminds me of my hopeless romantic fantasies and literary heroes. like her, i'm not demanding i just love fries. won't leave mcdo or jollibee without FRIES! sad to say i haven't found the guy who could give me my favorite fries. it's just that no one has sweep me off my feet YET. hope to find that guy destined for me because sometimes it really feels different when you have someone to talk to about your personal stuffs aside from your parents. valentines is so near but i guess i'll just spend that day celebrating my independence day instead of having so much fun with someone special in a fancy romantic place. toinks. :)

if he's the one and he's worth waiting for, i'll be patiently waiting for him.