I am just praying that, someday, I will find the man who will make me happy. Actually, I have a very deep (deep???) crush on someone right now. He really makes me feel so giddy. Ouch.. Here I am again, I get demoralized. Just typing this words already makes me smile. Aww... I'm head over heels in crush with him. So here's our story... my story I mean...
I had a bad impression when I first saw him, he was so sarcastic and I felt that he's insulting me. I was new back then, maybe, I said something stupid but I was really hurt that time. He was still assigned in our department and everyday I got chance to see him and talk to him but since I was newbie and I don't know how to speak their language I was always at the corner feeling lost and stupid just like the way I always am when I am still adjusting to a new environment.
Months later, I've noticed that though he looks so strong and brave on the outside, he's really kind and calm on the inside and for me it's like, "wow" he's so cool. I assisted him in one of his procedures and I'm sorry but I really don't find him smart. Aww as if I really know things but I found him really wrong at that moment and okay move on. Then a day came when most of the cases was for him to handle, some staffs were busy and for the entire shift were like partners in all of his procedure and I was so stupid I almost splashed the povidone iodine in his face but he didn't get mad at me. I was just---oh-em-g--- I'm sorry I really don't know how to do this please wait and bear with me and he was also patiently waiting for me to prepare things for him.
I was in an outgoing shift that time and there was still one patient, since he's in 24 hours duty he was still the one who handle the case, I want to endorse it because I want to finish my notes already but my workmates were busy chit chatting that time and he asked me if am I going home but still interested to the case. I want to tell him that I am more interested to the one who's doing the case but I didn't. He swept me off my feet that time that I kept on dreaming about him...
Gosh.., this seems to be a flashback of my high school experience. I am a diligent student but my high school crush was a not so smart guy in section F who's a chain smoker. That guy knew later in life that I had a crush on him so he's making pa cute to me but I didn't want to get associated with him so I kept my distance. Maybe, if he became my boyfriend my life has changed. Up until now he's friends are telling what's happening to him but I'm no longer interested. Anyways, going back to my new crush...
After so many days that for me are already a thousand years, I saw him this morning. OMG!!!!aw... just a glimpse of him already made my day. He's effect on me is more that a high dose of caffeine, goodness!
In my dreams (i made a story) that we became husband and wife (see how crazy i am?) but the struggle is where we settled later in life for he's not of the same country as me, he had different faith, he's culture is different. Our children were as smart as me (itaas ko na sariling kong bangko bleh) but were as good looking as him but since he's culture is different, our children must abide to his "social rules" but when it comes to school I'll be the one to decide. It was a bitter sweet story but it was nice. Actually I can make a book of it but no need, chakks, maybe I'm in love already. I don't know where this feeling will bring me. What I know is that I'm happy so just let me be- happy.
Even if he doesn't notice me, it's okay; I will be more glad looking at his face carelessly while he's doing a procedure. And yes, he's a doctor, a surgeon, a tall and white man who's not too smart but so kind. I'm sorry for telling he's not so smart but he just didn't reach my expectation of a doctor 'coz in our country doctors are great even if they are just residents. All I just to say to him is that "hope you stay the same, Loves". #
P.S.
Here's a pic of a fan girl who's head over heels in crush with someone. CT Sherryl
