Nonsense Conversation

When you and your boyfriend are talking about a certain thing and he doesn't get what you mean because he doesn't bother to think and understand you and he just drop the topic and talk about  a different issue and then the cycle repeats, that's the time you say to your self, OMG I have a nonsense guy. I can't believe I'm with a stupid guy. Maybe this is what I get for being so picky and feeling maganda. harhar. I've been crazy talking to myself and practicing lines that I want to say to this guy but whenever we start talking, I forget all the things that I want to say because he's very first words are already making my brain shrink.  OMG. he's the most annoying guy. I can't get anything from him. I couldn't believe I'm with him. I want a breakup. ughhhhhhhhhhh.

Airfare Promo

I got a round trip ticket to Manila for only 915!!!! Goodness, this is the best thing that happened to me today since my very busy schedule. I have so many patients. I looked so haggard but at the end of the day I had a big smile on my face. I'm beyond happy. And because duty is over, let's call it  a day. #breathing

P.S. Congrats Direk Paul and Toni Gonzaga. Best Wishes. :)

I don't own this photo. (c) to the owner 

#

Decide Fast

It was a very long day yesterday. Quite, exhausting. Emotionally exhausting. My friend's dad died of heart attack. Worst thing is, they were not able to decide fast. They were not able to decide fast enough to transfer the patient to a tertiary hospital where the patient could receive the necessary and prompt management. They were not able to decide fast because they didn't know it was a toxic case. They didn't know that their dad may die right away because of chest pain. They though it was just a simple chest pain. They didn't expect that chest pain could kill their dad. As a nurse, seeing the family mourn breaks my heart. Until now, it breaks my heart. I just want to unclog my brain of all the sad things that happened yesterday. I just want to take a deep breath. 

That incident opened my mind. It reminded me I should also check my parents' health. I'm praying for the soul of the dead. I'm praying for my friend's family, that eventually, even it's not easy, they will get through this. In God's time. 

Wedding Bells

High school days are the best days of my life that is why it is difficult for me to let go of my "high school vibe". When my former classmate invited me to her wedding day, a I was like, whhaaattt? Are you sure friend? I haven't found my on place in this world yet and you're already getting married?I was so alarmed I asked myself, am I being left out or they are just in a hurry?

My classmates, slowly, one by one, are inviting me to attend to their BIG DAY because they're getting married and are having baby.  I really don't understand why my friends are such in a hurry to settle while I still struggle to build my career. Maybe they are just into marriage because of pregnancy out wedlock,or because they are just in love and think that they have found the one. I don't really know their reasons but I'm so alarmed. haha. I still have so many dreams to fulfill, so many places I want to  go to, so many bags and shoes to splurge for but I'm so worried with my ovaries too. hahaha, I'm just having fun with my craziness 'cause honestly, I don't think I have matured enough. I still want to wander and play. I'm not getting married yet. Not yet.

 I feel like, in this very complex life, I am too young to settle. Despite the changes, the financial struggles, the love life problems, the questioning of self worth, the trials and errors and all the disappointments I've been through, I'd still choose to explore any opportunities and possibilities on my own and with no strings attached.

Family is very important to me and before I decide to have my own, I should be ready first. Financially, emotionally, and physically ready. haha. Isali talaga ang physically. I am not saying na 40 na ako mag-asawa. Andami ko ng unwanted curves nun at ang panget ko na sa wedding gown ko. Mga 30 years old siguro choks na.

I think it is difficult to achieve dreams and career when you're already married or when you're already a mother because your priorities change. I don't think I can work abroad with my child being left here in the Philippines.

Other than i'm-too-young-to-settle alibi,  my greatest struggle today is balancing between my career goals and relationship goals. lels. This may sound crazy but yes, I admit, it's very difficult for me to find a partner because I'm so picky. They say smart people also want smart people too. And though I'm not that smart, I really want a smart guy. huhu. #desperation. It's so difficult to find a smart guy who could ride on my weird choices. Why o why so difficult?



Even if they tell me Toni Gonzaga is getting married I'll tell them too, "so what? she's 30. I'm just 23. Duhhh????".

No matter what, I should never rush. I should explore the world of possibilities while I'm young and free. Maybe, my friends chose to settle because they are happy that way. We all have to find our own happiness anyway. They've already found there's. I should also find mine. #

I don't know if she noticed this but I think she became bitter since her breakup with her first and last boyfriend for eight long years.

Words to Ponder from Bo Sanchez

I bought one of Bo Sanchez's books almost a year ago and after reading it, I had a lovelife. lelz. I'm not sure if he's really the one but what I'm sure is that, I don't regret my decision of being with him. Found this pic from FB and I thought this is really worth a repost.

random thoughts

In love, find someone who has the same wavelength as you. Someone who (at least as smart as you) you can talk to and have coffee with. Someone who can make you happy and help you grow. Because at the end of the day, no matter how kind that person is, if he's boring to be with and you don't learn from him, you will end questioning yourself, why did i even choose this guy in the first place?