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Here's my take on the 2019 movie, After.
Well, this movie reminded me of my good old university days. I want to go back to college and fall in love again. For real.
I was in deep connection with a certain guy before, we were so close that I treated him as my best friend, someone that I can share my dreams onto. We realize that we have feelings for each other but then I was afraid that I might lose focus on my studies and end up pregnant because we're leaving under the same roof. I rejected the idea of being in a relationship with him which he also respected. I maintain my distance but still treated him as good friend. There were times that I feel I am hurting him because I ignore him in public and until now I feel guilty about it.
Fast forward to today, all my self-control paid off because I graduated with latin honor in college which he, my good friend considered to be something to be really proud of. He congratulated me and when he said it, I felt he was really happy and proud of me. Other than that, I also champed the intercollegiate parliamentary debate championship in my senior year which hailed me as one of the college debaters of the year.
We still get in touch from time to time with my good friend, pass the board exam individually, I mean we did not take the boards together because he transferred into another school and I finish college first but though he finished late he also passed the first time he took it 'cos he's just as smart like me you know. *wink
Time passed by and we opened to each other our dream of going to med school together but eventually I worked abroad and he proceeded to med school. He tried to convince but I decided not to come back because I don't want to drag my family into the financial crisis that I have to go to once I enter med school. So, after all the relationship that he had into and failed, I guess now, he finally found the one that he even implicitly told me once to get a boyfriend who could listen to my sentiments. We don't get in touch that much anymore.
He is also convinced that I am going to move into another country and live a good life there which he does not prefer for he believes that in the end OFWs will still come back home. If there are lessons that I learned from my past experiences that I recalled after watching the movie, it would be:
1. Being single gives you a lot of perks. It makes you free from complications and as we all know relationships are as stable as yo-yo so we shouldn't expect a lot when we're in it.I have achieved a lot of things when he wasn't with me. I owe it to the fact that I don't have to check if he agrees with my decision. But humans as we are we also need someone to talk and lean onto apart from our parents. Especially when we are in the university and away from our family and that's where intimacy comes in. Complications are fun too.
2. I didn't get into a relationship because I was afraid that if it will not work, I am going to lose my best friend and I never want that to happen. Time passed by and I lost him still. If I only knew that I am going to lose him anyway, I wish I have tried.
3. You are only young ones and it matters to feel in love when you are young 'cos you might never feel the same love again in your future years. Adults have more complicated lives and have more things to compromise.
4. If there's one thing that I regret, it is that I let my emotion overpower my intelligence. If I was only one pound stronger and wiser at that time , I could have taken my emotions to my own advantage. Whether the relationship will work or not I should have just prepare myself and grab the chance to be happy.
Tessa was so brave, she never let her broken heart break her and her studies. She was willing to take risks and brave enough and admit and say sorry for her mistakes.
I wish my friend will be able to read this, that I am sorry if I hurt him in anyway. I was very young at that time and pretty bad at handling my emotions. I want to blame him a bit too because honestly, I feel that he's not worthy to take risks for since he sweems to be unsure of his feelings. He doesn't have balls. Awww, just defending myself there. But yeah, until now, I still miss him. I am going to miss him forever and I already accepted that fact. That I'm gonna miss him and nothing more.
I hope someday, I will find the one who is worth missing. I still pray for that day so I can come out from this horrible feeling of missing someone who's no longer into you. OUch. That would be all about the drama. Until here and please read my next blog. I hope to share to you stories of my SG adventure.
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I was in deep connection with a certain guy before, we were so close that I treated him as my best friend, someone that I can share my dreams onto. We realize that we have feelings for each other but then I was afraid that I might lose focus on my studies and end up pregnant because we're leaving under the same roof. I rejected the idea of being in a relationship with him which he also respected. I maintain my distance but still treated him as good friend. There were times that I feel I am hurting him because I ignore him in public and until now I feel guilty about it.
Fast forward to today, all my self-control paid off because I graduated with latin honor in college which he, my good friend considered to be something to be really proud of. He congratulated me and when he said it, I felt he was really happy and proud of me. Other than that, I also champed the intercollegiate parliamentary debate championship in my senior year which hailed me as one of the college debaters of the year.
We still get in touch from time to time with my good friend, pass the board exam individually, I mean we did not take the boards together because he transferred into another school and I finish college first but though he finished late he also passed the first time he took it 'cos he's just as smart like me you know. *wink
Time passed by and we opened to each other our dream of going to med school together but eventually I worked abroad and he proceeded to med school. He tried to convince but I decided not to come back because I don't want to drag my family into the financial crisis that I have to go to once I enter med school. So, after all the relationship that he had into and failed, I guess now, he finally found the one that he even implicitly told me once to get a boyfriend who could listen to my sentiments. We don't get in touch that much anymore.
He is also convinced that I am going to move into another country and live a good life there which he does not prefer for he believes that in the end OFWs will still come back home. If there are lessons that I learned from my past experiences that I recalled after watching the movie, it would be:
1. Being single gives you a lot of perks. It makes you free from complications and as we all know relationships are as stable as yo-yo so we shouldn't expect a lot when we're in it.I have achieved a lot of things when he wasn't with me. I owe it to the fact that I don't have to check if he agrees with my decision. But humans as we are we also need someone to talk and lean onto apart from our parents. Especially when we are in the university and away from our family and that's where intimacy comes in. Complications are fun too.
2. I didn't get into a relationship because I was afraid that if it will not work, I am going to lose my best friend and I never want that to happen. Time passed by and I lost him still. If I only knew that I am going to lose him anyway, I wish I have tried.
3. You are only young ones and it matters to feel in love when you are young 'cos you might never feel the same love again in your future years. Adults have more complicated lives and have more things to compromise.
4. If there's one thing that I regret, it is that I let my emotion overpower my intelligence. If I was only one pound stronger and wiser at that time , I could have taken my emotions to my own advantage. Whether the relationship will work or not I should have just prepare myself and grab the chance to be happy.
Tessa was so brave, she never let her broken heart break her and her studies. She was willing to take risks and brave enough and admit and say sorry for her mistakes.
I wish my friend will be able to read this, that I am sorry if I hurt him in anyway. I was very young at that time and pretty bad at handling my emotions. I want to blame him a bit too because honestly, I feel that he's not worthy to take risks for since he sweems to be unsure of his feelings. He doesn't have balls. Awww, just defending myself there. But yeah, until now, I still miss him. I am going to miss him forever and I already accepted that fact. That I'm gonna miss him and nothing more.
I hope someday, I will find the one who is worth missing. I still pray for that day so I can come out from this horrible feeling of missing someone who's no longer into you. OUch. That would be all about the drama. Until here and please read my next blog. I hope to share to you stories of my SG adventure.
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